Thursday, January 21, 2010

Apples and oranges

Yes, sounds healthy. Until you think of delicious apple pie or creamy orange custard.... Now we're talking!

1. Don't bite into an orange and expect it to taste like an apple.

2. It is hard not to feel cheated when watching a movie about French people who never speak a word of French.

3. It's important to have something to wake up for other than work.

4. It's nice to have options, but you don't have to take them just because you have them.

5. If you consistently worry, it is impossible to be trained not to.

6. Passive Aggressive Social Management is when you decline an invitation by saying that you'll go, and then unceremoniously not going.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Great Expectations

Big life lessons? Might just be easier to settle for a Big slice of cake.
Let's get to it...

1. If you are not expecting to bump into anyone, expect to.

2. The name of a city may carry a more secret meaning than originally assumed.

3. When speaking in another language, you must think in that language.

4. "It's sad for a pizza when you have to add ketchup."

5. Keep your expectations low at all times. No exceptions. Ever.

6. When given the opportunity to take a penalty shot, your football skills far less important than your ability to read the goalkeeper's mind.

7. If the answer to your question has no added value, don't ask it.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Tequila pie

Short, refreshing and to-the-point. Just like a tequila shot.

1. One must outsource payment whenever possible.

2. Being Zen can more than often be misconstrued as being Boring.

3. When you get a craving, no matter how strong, it is just that. A craving.

4. Much to the chagrin of some, certain people often base decisions on Right Now, not The Future.

5. Having the ball in one's court is a fleeting but powerful occurrence.

6. Not all cake is created equal. Some cake is more equal than others.

7. There is a fine line between too much tequila and too little tequila. In retrospect, there is no such thing as too little; in the moment, there is no such thing as too much.

8. Advice is rarely warranted unless it has been requested. Even then, it is probably still unwarranted.

9. Decision-making is not as big a deal as some may make it out to be.

10. When in doubt between two tempting desserts, have both. (This is not to be used liberally as an analogy for other temptations.)