Thursday, November 6, 2008

Relevantly encyclopedic

Clouds in the sky.. they must have taken a wrong turn. Hopefully, like me, they will learn the right way for next time.

1. 'Puzzle' is not a game. You cannot be winning or losing. You cannot be in 1st, 4th or 17th place.

2. Odd days are best shared by those on the same frequency.

3. Being referred to as "encyclopedic" is, apparently, a compliment.

4. Even when stuck in a tree, not all kittens need to be rescued. Some learn how to get down on their own.

5. The most attractive ____________ is the one that doesn't ask for your friendship. (Please insert as appropriate.)

6. A musical education teaches you about more than just music.

7. Sometimes, we find ourselves having been friends with someone for so long, that they acquire the status of "friend by default".

8. Split ends cannot be repaired, they can only be cut off.

9. The Dubai Air Show is a great place to snare excessively rich, private-jet shopping, hopefully eligible bachelors.

10. It's tough to plan a surprise birthday party if you cannot confirm the attendance of the main party.

11. "Ignoring something is walking right through it even when it is standing in your way."

12. It's a small world. Whether this is positive or negative is yet to be seen, pending a lifetime of review.

13. When choosing a diamond, pick clarity over carat, but cut over colour.

14. In order to maximize the revenue on one's learnings, one must always always remember relevant learnings in times of relevance.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Smitten by change

I awoke inspired by the promise of change. So did my cab driver. Unfortunately, I couldn't offer him any. But I did learn quite a bit:

1. Even when we get to do what we want to and what we never imagine we'd be able to, we often don't get to do it in the way we would like to.

2. One's problems can be solved in the space and time of an elevator ride.

3. Waking up to the news of change is a great way to start the day. And eliminates snoozing. As does a missed call from someone miles, miles and MILES away!

4. Small and seemingly insignificant purchases can genuinely make one's day.

5. Nostalgia is a dangerous emotion, and often the cause of most "moments of weakness".

6. General 'missage' of the sister leads to more gifts bought for said sister.

7. Electing someone who is at or nearing life expectancy can't be wise. He's on borrowed time.

8. Making someone wait for a reply is a cruel but effective method of gaining the upper hand.

9. Bed sheets, once laundered, must be ironed.

10. A little consideration can go a long way.

11. Expensive hand soap and lotion renders the act of hand-washing much more enjoyable, yet much more guilt-laden than it should be.

12. Being smitten is a treacherously life-threatening state of being.

13. You are more likely to score a great parking spot if you are a nice person with manners.

14. When planning, delegation is key.

15. "Change" can also exist in the form of a covert haircut...

16. The easiest way to cast your second lead character is to cast the first one twice.

17. Like television, make-up also comes in high-definition.

18. "In a sit-com, you don't need to be funny, you just need to be relatable."

19. When building a wall, carefully consider the longevity of the bricks you use.

20. Sometimes the steak & burger analogy just doesn't cut it. No matter how rare the meat.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Heroin chic

Addicted yet?

1. 'I told you so', no matter how extremely warranted, is often unnecessary.

2. "Nothing is real until you start making money."

3. Talking about having children renders even some of the most verbose awkwardly speechless.

4. Pasta sauce is yummier when left to simmer. For hours.

5. The easiest way to see the person you live with is to occasionally spend some time in the place you live.

6. It is pretty easy to take something personally when you don't understand the other person's reasons and intentions.

7. Cooking while watching a movie about cooking makes cooking far more exciting and glamorous. Even if it's a movie about a rat.

8. Most intelligent people cannot use apostrophes correctly.

9. It is a rare and enchanting gift when one encounters another soul on the same frequency.

10. Being met with a package is always nice when arriving at a cluttered desk, and somewhat vaguely impressive to your neighbouring collegues.

11. "Life ain't what it seems."

12. You can grill meat on a PlayStation 3.

13. That odd instant when you have just woken up but are still sleeping is the most disorienting of the whole day.

14. 'There she goes', written by and originally performed by The La's (and not Sixpence None The Richer), is really about heroin, and not about a girl.

15. "Ice cream" is always the best answer to "What shoud we have for lunch?" Namely, double dark chocolate with oreos and heath bar. In a waffle cone. No, no sprinkles.

16. 7,634 songs on shuffle results in a troublingly appropriate soundtrack to complete one's day.

17. I have an irrationally compulsive affinity to adverbs.

Monday, November 3, 2008


Vaguely specific musings.
Somewhat educational. Wholly entertaining:

1. The same question asked of the same person in the same moment by two people can yield two very different answers, much to the chagrin of one of the people.

2. Answering a call from your equally verbose counterpart at 12:26am can only result in a 2:32am bedtime.

3. The Mona Lisa is just as intriguing as a puzzle as she is as a painting. If not more.

4. Sometimes, you just gotta party like it's 1999......

5. The chillest coolest people out there are sports events organizers. And outsourced puzzle labourers.

6. A to-do list makes it more fun to-do things.

7. One is more likely to feel smiley when one is wearing bright pink rather than when one is wearing gloomy grey.

8. It takes quite the effort to see the person you live with, regardless of how wonderful they are.

9. What a lovely feeling to receive a package in the mail! (Even when it's not addressed to you!)

10. The fewer the unread pages remaining in a good book, the more valuable they become.

11. Having been in someone's shoes makes it much easier to recognize them when you see them.

12. Once you've gotten used to great steak, you simply cannot (and cannot simply!) return to having fast-food burgers.

13. "A black cat is like a beautiful woman: she is intimidating to those who are too scared to get close enough to understand her."

14. The loveliness factor of one's day has absolutely nothing to do with the weather.

15. Pineapple, apparently, has some pretty interesting pretty R-rated side effects. (No elaboration to be provided. One should do one's own research!)

16. There is such thing as too much lobster, true, but only within a 24 hour period.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Double Entendres

The extensive ultimate collector's weekend edition:

1. A cosmopolitan at 3pm can only lead to an irresponsible shopping spree at Harvey Nichols and Tiffany's. Sans breakfast.

2. Explaining a Halloween costume is not necessary. Nobody listens past the word "slutty".

3. There is such thing as too much lobster.

4. Double entendres are highly entertaining, albeit sometimes elitestly so.

5. Late night chats with wonderful friends are exhaustingly enlightening. Even when disguisingly accompanied by a late night cup of tea or puzzle-making attempt.

6. Everyone has their story. Nobody leaves this world without one.

7. 'Consultants with social skills' is a narrowing pool of rare individuals. They can often be identified as the ones who can dance.

8. People's decisions are theirs to make, whether it be the right decision or wrong decision.

9. Some people, no matter how absent, have a way of being distressingly omnipresent.

10. A charming man with an accent is far more charming than a charming man without one.

11. Tiffany's is the only place to go when you have the mean reds...

12. Puzzles are excitingly intriguing when progress is being made. When faced with a lack of progress, one should politely sip on one's tea and point out certain pieces to the outsourced labour.

13. Sometimes first impressions are just that.

14. Musical exchanges lead to literary exchanges; both of which are dangerously revealing.

15. An owed favour is a highly appreciative currency. Invest.

16. Delivering a false hope is paramount on the list of irresponsible behaviour. Some questions are better left unanswered.

17. When guessing the amount of a bill and your wild "imagine-if" guess wins, it's usually not a good thing.

18. You can't have your cake and eat it too. But it's always okay to have just a slice.