Sometimes saying nothing says it all. But most times, saying nothing says nothing.
1. When faced with the question "McDonald's?" at 3 a.m. or thereabouts, your answer should always be a firm and unwavering "No." You will feel much thinner in the morning.
2. It is never necessary to ever consider actually changing a flat tire. There will always be an ego-starved stranger willing to show off his muscles.
3. Just because a restaurant closes at 11:30 doesn't mean you cannot show up at 11:25 and expect prawn bags and duck.
4. Dry cleaning, like overpriced vanilla lattes and a maid, is one of life's indispensable luxuries.
5. Cake and pie are not the same thing and cannot under any circumstances be interchanged haphazardly without any consideration for other people's feelings.
6. Heavy alcoholic nights make for very subdued days thereafter.
7. If you are two girls alone at a spa, you have given up the right to speculate regarding the sexuality of two boys also alone at the same spa at the same time.
8. As soon as you begin to wonder why you have not bumped into a certain person or the other in so long, they will inadvertently and without warning make an appearance in your day.
9. One should not taste delicious chocolate bars which are unavailable in one's place of current residence.
10. Pressure to communicate often hinders one's ability or desire to do so.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
Senti-mentalism
Back....with a bang? All in due time....
1. Being someone's muse isn't necessarily as fun as it sounds.
2. Resurrecting a sentimental song sans the sentimentalism allows one to re-enjoy a song in an altogether new way.
3. One's relationship with food says a lot more about them than one's relationships.
4. There are few instances where a bottle of wine between two is unwarranted. Very few.
5. There is a fine line between too much and too little. Always err on the side of the latter.
6. You know the universe is on your side when you arrive late at work, only to be greeted with the news that your boss is not there followed by an impromptu and extended coffee and cigarette break.
7. For some, mayhem is general; bedlam, far more personal.
8. In order for an electronic device to work, more often than not, it requires power in the form of a cable connecting it to a power socket.
9. Although somewhat painful, re-learning the same lesson (over and over) is sometimes necessary.
10. Washing and changing bed sheets is one of those logistical nightmares that will never improve with time.
11. When worshipping the sun, always apply sunblock generously. No exceptions.
12. Things change and continue to do so at a much faster rate than we will ever be able to fathom.
13. Putting something in writing doesn't make it more true; it only makes it more permanent.
14. What someone thinks of you is only important if you agree.
15. The ideal ratio of ingredients and perfect oven temperature is what makes a tray of cupcakes superlative. Not the stirring of the batter.
1. Being someone's muse isn't necessarily as fun as it sounds.
2. Resurrecting a sentimental song sans the sentimentalism allows one to re-enjoy a song in an altogether new way.
3. One's relationship with food says a lot more about them than one's relationships.
4. There are few instances where a bottle of wine between two is unwarranted. Very few.
5. There is a fine line between too much and too little. Always err on the side of the latter.
6. You know the universe is on your side when you arrive late at work, only to be greeted with the news that your boss is not there followed by an impromptu and extended coffee and cigarette break.
7. For some, mayhem is general; bedlam, far more personal.
8. In order for an electronic device to work, more often than not, it requires power in the form of a cable connecting it to a power socket.
9. Although somewhat painful, re-learning the same lesson (over and over) is sometimes necessary.
10. Washing and changing bed sheets is one of those logistical nightmares that will never improve with time.
11. When worshipping the sun, always apply sunblock generously. No exceptions.
12. Things change and continue to do so at a much faster rate than we will ever be able to fathom.
13. Putting something in writing doesn't make it more true; it only makes it more permanent.
14. What someone thinks of you is only important if you agree.
15. The ideal ratio of ingredients and perfect oven temperature is what makes a tray of cupcakes superlative. Not the stirring of the batter.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
On hiatus...
...indefinitely and until further notice.
(Cake currently being baked.)
S.
(Cake currently being baked.)
Still accepting 2008 learnings...
Toujours,S.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Unbottled
"No stone throwing regardless of housing situation."
1. A pretty dress on sale is far prettier than a pretty dress not on sale.
2. Lovely people do not always make lovely colleagues.
3. Whatever information is transferred during a drinking game must always remain at the bottom of the bottle.
4. Sometimes, all you need is a bigger hug.
5. Daunting tasks are mountains in foresight and mole hills in hindsight.
6. Playing dumb can be the smartest move you make.
7. When inebriated, one should remain as far away as possible from any communication devices.
8. During a recession, one should invest in Monopoly, duty-free booze and chill companions. And be open to drinking games.
9. Waking up at 7:30am will always seem like a wonderful wonderful idea the night before at 11:47pm but a horrible horrible idea at 7:35am.
10. Football on a television is the least taxing way to keep a man occupied.
11. Sometimes, visual aids make everything far far clearer.
12. Wine + Rodrigo y Gabriela + more wine = Wonderful!
1. A pretty dress on sale is far prettier than a pretty dress not on sale.
2. Lovely people do not always make lovely colleagues.
3. Whatever information is transferred during a drinking game must always remain at the bottom of the bottle.
4. Sometimes, all you need is a bigger hug.
5. Daunting tasks are mountains in foresight and mole hills in hindsight.
6. Playing dumb can be the smartest move you make.
7. When inebriated, one should remain as far away as possible from any communication devices.
8. During a recession, one should invest in Monopoly, duty-free booze and chill companions. And be open to drinking games.
9. Waking up at 7:30am will always seem like a wonderful wonderful idea the night before at 11:47pm but a horrible horrible idea at 7:35am.
10. Football on a television is the least taxing way to keep a man occupied.
11. Sometimes, visual aids make everything far far clearer.
12. Wine + Rodrigo y Gabriela + more wine = Wonderful!
Monday, January 19, 2009
A grey vein
Falling behind...or ahead of my time?
1. No girl wants to be "cute". And no guy wants to be "nice".
2. Ice cream is the life-source of unrivalled happiness.
3. Secrecy is overrated.
4. There exist several different levels of 'mutual'.
5. If you skip work and are healthy, coworkers suddenly become far less sympathetic when you skip work and are unhealthy.
6. Surprisingly, reading a book that a certain person has never read can remind you overwhelmingly of said certain person.
7. You can be friends or you can be more-than-friends but ultimately you cannot be both.
8. Dreams are your subconscious' way of pointing out that you have not considered all aspects of the equation.
9. Just because you can see a vein doesn't make it a good candidate for an IV tube.
10. The best way to rid yourself of an addiction is through micromanagement.
11. Do not judge people based just on their star sign. Their date of birth isn't really something they could have helped.
12. Old pictures may sometimes be an indication of new times.
13. 'Skinny vanilla latte and mini-muffins' trump 'Wake-up call' on the list of "Best Ways to Wake Up". 'Pancakes and kisses' trump both.
14. "One should absorb the colour of life, but one should never remember its details. Details are always vulgar." (Oscar Wilde)
(YouTube wouldn't let me embed...but click on the image)
Oh there's an emptiness inside her
And she'll do anything to fill it in
And though it's red blood bleeding from her now
It's more like cold blue ice in her heart
She feels like kicking out all the windows
And setting fire to this life
She could change everything about her
Using colors bold and bright
But all the colors mix together - to grey
1. No girl wants to be "cute". And no guy wants to be "nice".
2. Ice cream is the life-source of unrivalled happiness.
3. Secrecy is overrated.
4. There exist several different levels of 'mutual'.
5. If you skip work and are healthy, coworkers suddenly become far less sympathetic when you skip work and are unhealthy.
6. Surprisingly, reading a book that a certain person has never read can remind you overwhelmingly of said certain person.
7. You can be friends or you can be more-than-friends but ultimately you cannot be both.
8. Dreams are your subconscious' way of pointing out that you have not considered all aspects of the equation.
9. Just because you can see a vein doesn't make it a good candidate for an IV tube.
10. The best way to rid yourself of an addiction is through micromanagement.
11. Do not judge people based just on their star sign. Their date of birth isn't really something they could have helped.
12. Old pictures may sometimes be an indication of new times.
13. 'Skinny vanilla latte and mini-muffins' trump 'Wake-up call' on the list of "Best Ways to Wake Up". 'Pancakes and kisses' trump both.
14. "One should absorb the colour of life, but one should never remember its details. Details are always vulgar." (Oscar Wilde)
(YouTube wouldn't let me embed...but click on the image)
Oh there's an emptiness inside her
And she'll do anything to fill it in
And though it's red blood bleeding from her now
It's more like cold blue ice in her heart
She feels like kicking out all the windows
And setting fire to this life
She could change everything about her
Using colors bold and bright
But all the colors mix together - to grey
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Oceanic depths
It has been a while... but then again, isn't the passage of time simply a matter of relativity?
1. Friday nights can unexpectedly be the source of far too much food and far too much laughter.
2. Communication is elevated to an altogether different level when in the presence of a blueberry.
3. Breakfast is elevated to an altogether different level when in presence of blueberries.
4. The acquisition of said blueberry significantly deteriorates one's "letter writing skills".
5. Lovely weather is only ever fully appreciated by those living in areas of extreme weather.
6. A strategic change of desk may prove to serve far more many purposes than originally intended.
7. Visiting South America makes one feel terribly partial to speaking Spanish. And salsa dancing.
8. "Sometimes the details in the fabric are the things that make you panic...Are your thoughts the result of static cling? If you're shocked it's just the fault of faulty manufacturing."
9. An episode of Oprah may cause one to think a lot more than one would like to admit.
10. The Atlantic Ocean serves no purpose whatsoever.
11. There are some albums which one never ever ever tires of listening to.
12. Not all things benefit from being defined.
13. Missing friends is one of the saddest facts of life. And one of the least solvable.
14. Hearing the song you least expect on the radio will plaster a smile on your face for significantly longer than usual.
1. Friday nights can unexpectedly be the source of far too much food and far too much laughter.
2. Communication is elevated to an altogether different level when in the presence of a blueberry.
3. Breakfast is elevated to an altogether different level when in presence of blueberries.
4. The acquisition of said blueberry significantly deteriorates one's "letter writing skills".
5. Lovely weather is only ever fully appreciated by those living in areas of extreme weather.
6. A strategic change of desk may prove to serve far more many purposes than originally intended.
7. Visiting South America makes one feel terribly partial to speaking Spanish. And salsa dancing.
8. "Sometimes the details in the fabric are the things that make you panic...Are your thoughts the result of static cling? If you're shocked it's just the fault of faulty manufacturing."
9. An episode of Oprah may cause one to think a lot more than one would like to admit.
10. The Atlantic Ocean serves no purpose whatsoever.
11. There are some albums which one never ever ever tires of listening to.
12. Not all things benefit from being defined.
13. Missing friends is one of the saddest facts of life. And one of the least solvable.
14. Hearing the song you least expect on the radio will plaster a smile on your face for significantly longer than usual.
Monday, January 5, 2009
A fixedly temporary fix...
Long overdue but yes, still around to haunt your afternoons...
1. "Having a sister is better than having a wallet."
2. All books have imperfections.
3. One-day resolutions have been found to be most effective.
4. Reaction is more telling than action, but sometimes inaction even more so.
5. There are some voids that only certain individuals can fill; the rest is just spackle.
6. 'Re-friending' may not always be a valid option.
7. People often act in ways, believing all so confidently that they are hiding their true colours, but unwittingly brandishing them oh so evidently.
8. Without a SIM card, a blackberry is just a game boy. But an excellent one at that.
9. (Very much a reiterated learning but omnipresently, and somewhat ominously, relevant...) At the end of the day, always ask yourself "So what?"
10. Sometimes advance notice is not advanced enough.
11. There will always be a gentleman who is more than willing to light a lady's cigarette.
12. Some people are simply bad cooks, but you will find that they probably have other good qualities.
13. New Year's Eve makes people unnaturally nostalgic and unhealthily optimistic.
14. Water is the solution to most problems. Alcohol, far less so.
15. "Some people get laid a lot but that doesn't mean they're happy."
16. Disclosed and unrequited emotions cause an undisclosed and requited amount of discomfort.
17. In the absence of a lovely call, a terrible terrible nightmare is a very effective, albeit uncool, method of waking up early in the morning.
18. Unsolicited advice is usually but unsurprisingly unappreciated.
19. "If you wait around long enough, the universe will practically hand stuff to you."
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Unwrapped to reveal a set of matching anythings
Heavily medicated with a good dose of chocolate...
1. Left undocumented, learnings still retain their intended weight and significance.
2. No man should ever buy a set of matching anythings. Unless they consist of diamonds and are being offered as a gift. To me.
3. At a birthday celebration, the priority is always that the birthday girl has the best day ever. And that a candle appears atop a dessert of some sort.
4. At a Secret Santa exchange, the volunteer Santa's hidden agenda is to trap an unsuspecting female in his lap.
5. One can be vague without being perplexing.
6. It is every girl's secret dream to be married more than once.
7. No man ever wants to be categorized as a medium.
8. One's level of tiredness is directly and reflectively correlated to one's level of happiness.
9. One should not blame one's failings on one's lineage.
10. "Everything you do under the table comes back to bite you from under the chair."
11. Visa and Mastercard can only be so generous.
12. You don't always get what you give, and credit does not always end up where credit is due.
13. Existing on other people's schedules is no way to exist.
14. Choosing songs to be added to someone's iPod is one of the sincerest forms of communication.
15. Comfortable silences are a far better alternative to uncomfortable chatter.
16. Unexpected yes devious discounts result in the expenditure of more funds.
17. Driving in the rain is rendered all the more convoluted when the nice white lines on the highway become muddled and obscure.
18. Wrapping paper is far more telling than one first anticipates.
19. Too much pressure diminishes the pleasure associated with certain life-enhancing activities.
1. Left undocumented, learnings still retain their intended weight and significance.
2. No man should ever buy a set of matching anythings. Unless they consist of diamonds and are being offered as a gift. To me.
3. At a birthday celebration, the priority is always that the birthday girl has the best day ever. And that a candle appears atop a dessert of some sort.
4. At a Secret Santa exchange, the volunteer Santa's hidden agenda is to trap an unsuspecting female in his lap.
5. One can be vague without being perplexing.
6. It is every girl's secret dream to be married more than once.
7. No man ever wants to be categorized as a medium.
8. One's level of tiredness is directly and reflectively correlated to one's level of happiness.
9. One should not blame one's failings on one's lineage.
10. "Everything you do under the table comes back to bite you from under the chair."
11. Visa and Mastercard can only be so generous.
12. You don't always get what you give, and credit does not always end up where credit is due.
13. Existing on other people's schedules is no way to exist.
14. Choosing songs to be added to someone's iPod is one of the sincerest forms of communication.
15. Comfortable silences are a far better alternative to uncomfortable chatter.
16. Unexpected yes devious discounts result in the expenditure of more funds.
17. Driving in the rain is rendered all the more convoluted when the nice white lines on the highway become muddled and obscure.
18. Wrapping paper is far more telling than one first anticipates.
19. Too much pressure diminishes the pleasure associated with certain life-enhancing activities.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Forgetfully mis-remembered
One's musical obsessions may or may not increase one's insanity levels...Regardless, they remain a great source of learnings.
2. Too much of a good thing is not a good thing. Particularly in the case of especially good wine.
3. In bad times, a puzzle always comes in handy.
4. Never go shopping without a shopping list.
5. The recurring bumping-into-someone may or may not serve a higher purpose.
6. Family is a concept which is related at times to your relations and at others, to your relationships.
7. People will often do as much and go as far as they can possibly get away with.
8. Double standards render an otherwise likeable person highly unlikable.
9. Forgetting and mis-remembering are very similar yet very very different things.
10. 'Sister' is not simply a way to describe a person's relation to you, it is a position that can be filled by a very very elite few. Or a very elite one. It can also be a person's name.
11. Throwing two objects, as opposed to just one, at a public (and publicly humiliated) figure does not necessarily increase one's chance of hitting said figure.
1. Waking up late is sometimes rewarded with a lovely non-fat vanilla latte and a smile.
2. Too much of a good thing is not a good thing. Particularly in the case of especially good wine.
3. In bad times, a puzzle always comes in handy.
4. Never go shopping without a shopping list.
5. The recurring bumping-into-someone may or may not serve a higher purpose.
6. Family is a concept which is related at times to your relations and at others, to your relationships.
7. People will often do as much and go as far as they can possibly get away with.
8. Double standards render an otherwise likeable person highly unlikable.
9. Forgetting and mis-remembering are very similar yet very very different things.
10. 'Sister' is not simply a way to describe a person's relation to you, it is a position that can be filled by a very very elite few. Or a very elite one. It can also be a person's name.
11. Throwing two objects, as opposed to just one, at a public (and publicly humiliated) figure does not necessarily increase one's chance of hitting said figure.
12. "Hold your own, know your name, and go your own way..."
13. ...(Courtesy of Postsecret.com...)
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Mr. Frost and Mr. Newton
A certain Mr. Frost once said, "In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." Clever man, that Mr. Frost...
1. "No one is ever going to love you as much as you love you."
2. Mutual and addictive attachment is often and unfortunately misconstrued as love.
3. That last glass of champagne is always the one that does you in. Next time, don't have it.
4. "Drunk" does not equal "busy".
5. Actions speak louder than words, yes, but it is reactions that speak all the much louder.
6. Curly hair helps shape the illusion of laid back-ness and super relaxation.
7. Being different is not the same thing as being crazy. And regardless, neither is so bad after all.
8. "One must always climb the ladder step by step."
9. Always keep all your options open. Especially when it comes to lunch.
10. "Never tell your sisters you are going for a birthday event as they will not let you leave the house in your usual comfortable attire and insist you shower and shoe up."
11. In the company of a credit card, you will find it almost impossible not to whip it out and purchase some super flaky French biscuit chocolates.
12. Nursing a hangover with 3 consecutive glasses of the Diablo off-set by a steak, all kinds of carbs and a sinful medley of desserts is the only way to do so.
13. "Sex is the ultimate expression of death." (The wise-ish words of a certain quel qu'un.)
14. The secret dimension of travel and airlines also believes quite adamantly in karma. Getting a free day 'here' will always be supplemented by losing a free day 'there'.
15. Christmas shopping is a wonderful excuse to leave every retail endroit you enter with a bag of its wares.
16. "If it's a broken part, replace it. But, if it's a broken arm then brace it. If it's a broken heart then face it..."
1. "No one is ever going to love you as much as you love you."
2. Mutual and addictive attachment is often and unfortunately misconstrued as love.
3. That last glass of champagne is always the one that does you in. Next time, don't have it.
4. "Drunk" does not equal "busy".
5. Actions speak louder than words, yes, but it is reactions that speak all the much louder.
6. Curly hair helps shape the illusion of laid back-ness and super relaxation.
7. Being different is not the same thing as being crazy. And regardless, neither is so bad after all.
8. "One must always climb the ladder step by step."
9. Always keep all your options open. Especially when it comes to lunch.
10. "Never tell your sisters you are going for a birthday event as they will not let you leave the house in your usual comfortable attire and insist you shower and shoe up."
11. In the company of a credit card, you will find it almost impossible not to whip it out and purchase some super flaky French biscuit chocolates.
12. Nursing a hangover with 3 consecutive glasses of the Diablo off-set by a steak, all kinds of carbs and a sinful medley of desserts is the only way to do so.
13. "Sex is the ultimate expression of death." (The wise-ish words of a certain quel qu'un.)
14. The secret dimension of travel and airlines also believes quite adamantly in karma. Getting a free day 'here' will always be supplemented by losing a free day 'there'.
15. Christmas shopping is a wonderful excuse to leave every retail endroit you enter with a bag of its wares.
16. "If it's a broken part, replace it. But, if it's a broken arm then brace it. If it's a broken heart then face it..."
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Parfois décapotable
"I used to roll the dice... feel the fear in my enemy's eyes"
1. You either want someone or you don't. There is no grey area. And if you don't, by definition, you are not allowed to have an opinion on who does. Otherwise, this is referred to as "having your cake and eating it too."
2. Bank people are the worst people to chat to right about midmorning if you need something done.
3. Repeatedly binging on certain fast-food constituents on anything more than a yearly basis is a horrible terrible horrendous terrifying mistake. Instead, one should contend with going to bed slightly intoxicated and with an inkling of hunger.
4. A semi-strict diet to become very hot is a better option than a very strict diet to become semi-hot.
5. "Women are like instruments, if you play them right, they will... hum."
6. Watching a concert from a VIP lounge is infinitely cooler than mixing with the masses.
7. A décapotable is not always as cool and easy breezy as the movies make it look. Especially when mazing through the big construction site that is this city.
8. There is a thin line between endearing and stalkerish.
9. When imparting words of any nature, one must be fully aware of the context in which they are imparted...
10. ...And when exchanging words, one much ensure that all parties speak the same language.
11. There is no such thing as a wasted day. Spending a day wasted, on the other hand, is encouraged.
"One minute I held the key, next the walls were closed on me, and I discovered that my castles stand, upon pillars of salt, pillars of sand..."
1. You either want someone or you don't. There is no grey area. And if you don't, by definition, you are not allowed to have an opinion on who does. Otherwise, this is referred to as "having your cake and eating it too."
2. Bank people are the worst people to chat to right about midmorning if you need something done.
3. Repeatedly binging on certain fast-food constituents on anything more than a yearly basis is a horrible terrible horrendous terrifying mistake. Instead, one should contend with going to bed slightly intoxicated and with an inkling of hunger.
4. A semi-strict diet to become very hot is a better option than a very strict diet to become semi-hot.
5. "Women are like instruments, if you play them right, they will... hum."
6. Watching a concert from a VIP lounge is infinitely cooler than mixing with the masses.
7. A décapotable is not always as cool and easy breezy as the movies make it look. Especially when mazing through the big construction site that is this city.
8. There is a thin line between endearing and stalkerish.
9. When imparting words of any nature, one must be fully aware of the context in which they are imparted...
10. ...And when exchanging words, one much ensure that all parties speak the same language.
11. There is no such thing as a wasted day. Spending a day wasted, on the other hand, is encouraged.
"One minute I held the key, next the walls were closed on me, and I discovered that my castles stand, upon pillars of salt, pillars of sand..."
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Diamonds are this girl's best friend
Forgetting one's earphones at home makes for an eerily soundtrackless day...
1. Remembering learnings over a 5-day vacation span is slightly unrealistic, especially given the presence of occasional alcoholism and naps.
2. Remembering what one did over a 5-day vacation span is very unrealistic, especially given the presence of frequent alcoholism and long naps and exciting poker games.
3. Love can come in the form of juice. Or jewelry.
4. Good things come in small packages. But small things can come in big packages.
5. 'Why not' is not an adequate reason why.
6. A couple of kilos is a fair price to pay for happiness.
7. Gifts are easy peasy. If you want your girlfriend to fall in love with you: Tiffany's, Cartier, Graff or DeBeers. If you want her to break up with you: Virgin Megastore gift voucher.
8. Apparently, a turkey gains cute-ness status only once stuffed, roasted, carved and consumed.
9. With increasing occurrence, the stock value of a long-distance call decreases considerably. Unless accompanied by a Western Union money transfer. In which case, stock value increases.
10. When it comes to Christmas gifts, it's the thought that counts. But if you have Visa and Mastercard on your side, the bigger the diamond the better.
11. An unusually large aquarium in a gaudy sprawling mall will draw a representative Dubai demographic.
12. The best way to justify the impulsive purchase of an expensive item is to convert the cost into another more valuable currency. The sound of the number feels much better.
13. It is little worrisome when you find you are relating a little too much to a little gem of a book with the little word "booty" right there in the title.
14. The amount of seafood which a group of people can eat in one sitting is equal to the amount of seafood which makes it to the table.
15. A maid is the one indispensable luxury which one should never skimp on. Along with over-priced morning coffees and croissants.
16. Feeling forgotten and being forgotten are two very different things.
17. Electronics stores have especially gruesomely unsightly lighting.
18. In the absence of cuddly sweaters and falling snow, that special Christmas feeling can be simulated by the buying of many many super duper cool gifts.
19. There is nothing that lifts the spirits quite like lovely weather, lots and lots of smiles and the prospect of lunch with a good friend.
20. The longer the break between learnings, the longer the learnings...
1. Remembering learnings over a 5-day vacation span is slightly unrealistic, especially given the presence of occasional alcoholism and naps.
2. Remembering what one did over a 5-day vacation span is very unrealistic, especially given the presence of frequent alcoholism and long naps and exciting poker games.
3. Love can come in the form of juice. Or jewelry.
4. Good things come in small packages. But small things can come in big packages.
5. 'Why not' is not an adequate reason why.
6. A couple of kilos is a fair price to pay for happiness.
7. Gifts are easy peasy. If you want your girlfriend to fall in love with you: Tiffany's, Cartier, Graff or DeBeers. If you want her to break up with you: Virgin Megastore gift voucher.
8. Apparently, a turkey gains cute-ness status only once stuffed, roasted, carved and consumed.
9. With increasing occurrence, the stock value of a long-distance call decreases considerably. Unless accompanied by a Western Union money transfer. In which case, stock value increases.
10. When it comes to Christmas gifts, it's the thought that counts. But if you have Visa and Mastercard on your side, the bigger the diamond the better.
11. An unusually large aquarium in a gaudy sprawling mall will draw a representative Dubai demographic.
12. The best way to justify the impulsive purchase of an expensive item is to convert the cost into another more valuable currency. The sound of the number feels much better.
13. It is little worrisome when you find you are relating a little too much to a little gem of a book with the little word "booty" right there in the title.
14. The amount of seafood which a group of people can eat in one sitting is equal to the amount of seafood which makes it to the table.
15. A maid is the one indispensable luxury which one should never skimp on. Along with over-priced morning coffees and croissants.
16. Feeling forgotten and being forgotten are two very different things.
17. Electronics stores have especially gruesomely unsightly lighting.
18. In the absence of cuddly sweaters and falling snow, that special Christmas feeling can be simulated by the buying of many many super duper cool gifts.
19. There is nothing that lifts the spirits quite like lovely weather, lots and lots of smiles and the prospect of lunch with a good friend.
20. The longer the break between learnings, the longer the learnings...
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Controversially grand
"Justifying reasons why is an absolutely insane resolution to live by..."
1. "When it comes to food, you should always only ever be tasting."
2. It is always better to regret something that you did rather than something you didn't do.
3. Detachment, of any sort, is much easier than one is led to believe.
4. There are people in your life who will eternally teach you things without realising they are doing so.
5. Not all calls need to be answered.
6. When you lay your cards on the table, you are inherently stating your openness to alter them.
7. There's nothing quite like a grand gesture.
8. At times, the game is more important than the end result.
9. It is sometimes necessary to go the distance just to make a statement.
10. When in doubt, let the weather decide for you.
11. Controversial events from the past make confirming their dates all the more controversial.
12. Control is something we like to believe we always have. The actuality is alarmingly the opposite.
13. The semblance of independence is a deceiving mask for the deep reality of dependence.
14. Some learnings, one learns, are too valuable to share selflessly.
Great musician, wonderful learning.
(Courtesy of someone who, I know, like me, believes in the importance of learning...)
1. "When it comes to food, you should always only ever be tasting."
2. It is always better to regret something that you did rather than something you didn't do.
3. Detachment, of any sort, is much easier than one is led to believe.
4. There are people in your life who will eternally teach you things without realising they are doing so.
5. Not all calls need to be answered.
6. When you lay your cards on the table, you are inherently stating your openness to alter them.
7. There's nothing quite like a grand gesture.
8. At times, the game is more important than the end result.
9. It is sometimes necessary to go the distance just to make a statement.
10. When in doubt, let the weather decide for you.
11. Controversial events from the past make confirming their dates all the more controversial.
12. Control is something we like to believe we always have. The actuality is alarmingly the opposite.
13. The semblance of independence is a deceiving mask for the deep reality of dependence.
14. Some learnings, one learns, are too valuable to share selflessly.
Great musician, wonderful learning.
(Courtesy of someone who, I know, like me, believes in the importance of learning...)
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Tripping backwards
The clouds are back...looking more out of place than ever.
1. A day off will totally throw you off.
2. When being close enough is not an option, one must contend with being close enough.
3. "Short hair is better than anything Victoria's Secret can ever come up with."
4. If you're not moving forward, you are only moving backwards.
5. A rebound is not a solution; it's a distraction.
6. The same trip in a different car makes for an altogether different trip.
7. "The fish is more important than the phonecall."
8. When weighed down by too much emotional baggage, one must do all one can to simply lose it. You might miss your stuff, but the airline will reimburse you somewhat and you will feel much lighter afterwards.
9. When you miss 'your person', you miss 'your person'. The only solution is the regaining of said person back in your world.
10. The most interesting of 3-ways occur unexpectedly across different time zones and during the witching hour for some. And at the expense of certain investment and financial advisory firms.
11. Implementation of the suffix "-ish" is a completely acceptable form of communication enhancement when one is attempting to remain 'easy breezy'.
12. An early evening nap on a comfortable couch and fluffy pillow can only lead to a late night drink and complex card game.
13. "When you escape the tiger you don't hang around to give him a long last look goodbye. That's when he'll eat you alive."
14. A good friend is one who will let you hear the same sappy song several several several times in a row.
(Yes, a little obsessed. But how can you say no to a little John Mayer as the icing on top?)
1. A day off will totally throw you off.
2. When being close enough is not an option, one must contend with being close enough.
3. "Short hair is better than anything Victoria's Secret can ever come up with."
4. If you're not moving forward, you are only moving backwards.
5. A rebound is not a solution; it's a distraction.
6. The same trip in a different car makes for an altogether different trip.
7. "The fish is more important than the phonecall."
8. When weighed down by too much emotional baggage, one must do all one can to simply lose it. You might miss your stuff, but the airline will reimburse you somewhat and you will feel much lighter afterwards.
9. When you miss 'your person', you miss 'your person'. The only solution is the regaining of said person back in your world.
10. The most interesting of 3-ways occur unexpectedly across different time zones and during the witching hour for some. And at the expense of certain investment and financial advisory firms.
11. Implementation of the suffix "-ish" is a completely acceptable form of communication enhancement when one is attempting to remain 'easy breezy'.
12. An early evening nap on a comfortable couch and fluffy pillow can only lead to a late night drink and complex card game.
13. "When you escape the tiger you don't hang around to give him a long last look goodbye. That's when he'll eat you alive."
14. A good friend is one who will let you hear the same sappy song several several several times in a row.
(Yes, a little obsessed. But how can you say no to a little John Mayer as the icing on top?)
Monday, December 1, 2008
Morbidly mysterious
"I'm just a little bit caught in the middle..."
1. Not everyone has a happy place. Some of us only have a dark and twisty place.
2. A poor pretend husband with a discount is better than a rich pretend one without.
3. Beach plans cannot exist independently of the weather.
4. Under-rating oneself is a sneaky way of causing oneself to be over-valued.
5. Sometimes not talking about something is the only way to solve it.
6. "It is not a bad thing to admit one's true intentions."
7. Strange evenings can only lead to strange dreams and can only be succeeded by strange mornings extending into strange days.
8. "Always seems to me, you only see what people want you to see."
9. Eleventh hour learnings often require 11th hour postings. And often quite literally so.
10. Depending on one's internal currency, honesty can be worth a plethora of values.
11. Smell is the strongest sense tied to memory.
12. Indirect communication and direct miscommunication are two very two-way streets.
1. Not everyone has a happy place. Some of us only have a dark and twisty place.
2. A poor pretend husband with a discount is better than a rich pretend one without.
3. Beach plans cannot exist independently of the weather.
4. Under-rating oneself is a sneaky way of causing oneself to be over-valued.
5. Sometimes not talking about something is the only way to solve it.
6. "It is not a bad thing to admit one's true intentions."
7. Strange evenings can only lead to strange dreams and can only be succeeded by strange mornings extending into strange days.
8. "Always seems to me, you only see what people want you to see."
9. Eleventh hour learnings often require 11th hour postings. And often quite literally so.
10. Depending on one's internal currency, honesty can be worth a plethora of values.
11. Smell is the strongest sense tied to memory.
12. Indirect communication and direct miscommunication are two very two-way streets.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Internal confusion of the spotless mind
Ice-cream for breakfast... with a side of pancakes and a coffee with a kiss?
1. "I am at the mercy of gravity."
2. When received in exchange for cars and diamonds, smiles and hugs become very much overrated.
3. Not all beings understand the concept of sarcasm.
4. 'Crazy' is only a matter of perspective.
5. "Listen, you can't have everything." (Very similar to a certain cake-themed learning...)
6. In the absence of physical proof, airtight and ironclad explanations are required to validate denial.
7. Eating is not a necessity, it is an activity that one partakes in given the company of good friends...
8. ...and drinking on an empty stomach is indeed a very efficient path to inebriation!
9. Solace can be found in the most unexpected of best friends, good friends or acquaintances.
10. Emotional detachment and unemotional attachment sit on opposite ends of a convoluted spectrum.
11. It is entirely and understandably possible to dislike something, someplace or someone simply based on their role in relation to you. Theory of relativity.
12. There is nothing more frustrating than sheer incompetence.
13. One can be bitchy without in actual fact being a bitch.
14. "Boyfriends are a bit of a hassle."
15. Murphy was right. What ever can go wrong, will go wrong. Very very wrong.
16. Generic pet names can often achieve the opposite of their intended result. Cryptically personal is far more appealing.
17. Sharing one's learnings while with-holding information can only lead to a terribly cryptic form of distressing internal confusion.
1. "I am at the mercy of gravity."
2. When received in exchange for cars and diamonds, smiles and hugs become very much overrated.
3. Not all beings understand the concept of sarcasm.
4. 'Crazy' is only a matter of perspective.
5. "Listen, you can't have everything." (Very similar to a certain cake-themed learning...)
6. In the absence of physical proof, airtight and ironclad explanations are required to validate denial.
7. Eating is not a necessity, it is an activity that one partakes in given the company of good friends...
8. ...and drinking on an empty stomach is indeed a very efficient path to inebriation!
9. Solace can be found in the most unexpected of best friends, good friends or acquaintances.
10. Emotional detachment and unemotional attachment sit on opposite ends of a convoluted spectrum.
11. It is entirely and understandably possible to dislike something, someplace or someone simply based on their role in relation to you. Theory of relativity.
12. There is nothing more frustrating than sheer incompetence.
13. One can be bitchy without in actual fact being a bitch.
14. "Boyfriends are a bit of a hassle."
15. Murphy was right. What ever can go wrong, will go wrong. Very very wrong.
16. Generic pet names can often achieve the opposite of their intended result. Cryptically personal is far more appealing.
17. Sharing one's learnings while with-holding information can only lead to a terribly cryptic form of distressing internal confusion.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Reiterative cups of tea
It's never that bad... sometimes all we need is a little perspective.
1. Someone may be nice enough, but that doesn't make them nice enough.
2. Being "Dubaiian" and being "Western" are two very very unrelated concepts.
3. "You're not supposed to look like your jeans, your jeans are supposed to look like you!"
4. Some words carry too much responsibility to be uttered carelessly.
5. You always have a choice. (A repeat I believe, but reiteration is sometimes warranted...)
6. No matter how fun the game was, if you lost, you still lost.
7. Tea can be a big hassle or tea can be simple and chill.
8. Silly problems often require silly solutions.
9. If one has not entered a radio competition, one is unlikely to have won a Mazda 6 on the radio. If one does in fact win a Mazda 6, one should use it for the purposes of conveying yellow roses.
10. Your lack of ability to spell a word doesn't make you any less allowed to use it.
11. A refusal to acknowledge certain weather conditions in certain places is a normal reaction to a consistent climatic abnormality.
12. One must be cut-throat when attempting to secure coveted free tickets for a friend.
13. Waking up on the right side of bed is often associated with a yester-evening of great wine, good company and a hopeless card game.
14. Being a good friend can take on many forms, most of which are unfortunately and unforeseeably misinterpreted.
1. Someone may be nice enough, but that doesn't make them nice enough.
2. Being "Dubaiian" and being "Western" are two very very unrelated concepts.
3. "You're not supposed to look like your jeans, your jeans are supposed to look like you!"
4. Some words carry too much responsibility to be uttered carelessly.
5. You always have a choice. (A repeat I believe, but reiteration is sometimes warranted...)
6. No matter how fun the game was, if you lost, you still lost.
7. Tea can be a big hassle or tea can be simple and chill.
8. Silly problems often require silly solutions.
9. If one has not entered a radio competition, one is unlikely to have won a Mazda 6 on the radio. If one does in fact win a Mazda 6, one should use it for the purposes of conveying yellow roses.
10. Your lack of ability to spell a word doesn't make you any less allowed to use it.
11. A refusal to acknowledge certain weather conditions in certain places is a normal reaction to a consistent climatic abnormality.
12. One must be cut-throat when attempting to secure coveted free tickets for a friend.
13. Waking up on the right side of bed is often associated with a yester-evening of great wine, good company and a hopeless card game.
14. Being a good friend can take on many forms, most of which are unfortunately and unforeseeably misinterpreted.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Artistically coded
"You've been drifting for a long long time..."
1. When one starts one's day on the wrong side of one's bed, one must do all one can to minimise the length of one's said day.
2. Therapy can be stumbled upon by the most unsuspecting of people in the most unsuspecting of places.
3. Music is often a safe alternative to conversation in the morning.
4. When sending a message, employ as much code as coherently possible; you never know who you might have sent it to by mistake instead.
5. When the stars are aligned correctly, a series of playful cryptic exchanges can result in finding oneself surrounded by more flowers than ever previously fathomed.
6. Art is defined as art when someone believes it to be so.
7. Suggesting a bigger size is never an option.
8. Although often associated, being honest and being blunt are two very very different things.
9. It is best to avoid transparent clothing when shopping for your daily wardrobe.
10. On rare events, certain menu items taste much better than they look. In times of famishment/selfishness, one much keep this information deceptively confidential.
11. Crazy behaviour, it seems, is more acceptable than previously thought.
12. Be careful what you throw at people:
(Always clickable...)
1. When one starts one's day on the wrong side of one's bed, one must do all one can to minimise the length of one's said day.
2. Therapy can be stumbled upon by the most unsuspecting of people in the most unsuspecting of places.
3. Music is often a safe alternative to conversation in the morning.
4. When sending a message, employ as much code as coherently possible; you never know who you might have sent it to by mistake instead.
5. When the stars are aligned correctly, a series of playful cryptic exchanges can result in finding oneself surrounded by more flowers than ever previously fathomed.
6. Art is defined as art when someone believes it to be so.
7. Suggesting a bigger size is never an option.
8. Although often associated, being honest and being blunt are two very very different things.
9. It is best to avoid transparent clothing when shopping for your daily wardrobe.
10. On rare events, certain menu items taste much better than they look. In times of famishment/selfishness, one much keep this information deceptively confidential.
11. Crazy behaviour, it seems, is more acceptable than previously thought.
12. Be careful what you throw at people:
(Always clickable...)
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Symbolically Rosey
"Just a minute of your time, yes I've been known to delude myself, so let me put those rose-coloured glasses to the test....."
1. The security of stability helps significantly in keeping one sane.
2. Traffic lights and elevators are the unwitting catalysts of most life-changing events.
3. "Yellow roses were long used as a symbol for jealousy and dying love."
4. One often represses memories which one prefers not to remember. Especially those involving cones or cupcakes.
5. A car is not smarter than you.
6. Toffee-nut lattes are like summer flings: fun while they last and odd-tasting out of season.
7. A happy mask is rarely a good disguise.
8. Great ideas unshared might as well never have been.
9. Indirect communication may at times be more courageous than the direct kind.
10. You may believe you are speaking cryptically, but you may actually be 'speaking' in the language of someone who is listening.
11. Not knowing where you're going is not so bad if you are going there with someone else:
Monday, November 24, 2008
Silent garnishes
Sometimes sequences of events, although seemingly random, may fit snugly and quite alarmingly into the big picture.......
1. A bottle of wine is only as good as the company, yes, but also the food you eat it with.
2. When eating fancy food, one must find a way to distinguish between garnish, decoration and preparation.
3. Terrible service and exceptional service can co-exist in the same day. The memory of the latter far outweighs the memory of the former.
4. You can never go wrong when ordering lobster.
5. When one is in a hurry, one somehow becomes a traffic magnet.
6. Owed favours, although appreciative, do have an expiry date.
7. 'Table for 6' can become 'table for 7' with a smile and excessive compliments to the hostess.
8. Men see cars the same way women see jewelry: a safer endroit where to invest their love.
9. Silently willing someone to stay is simply not enough to get them to stay.
10. Waking up in the morning to a lack of pancakes, coffee or kisses is a modern form of torture.
11. Ordering a cake is serious business.
12. "Don't try to weasel your way out of something, you will just end up weaseling your way into something much worse."
13. Even when placed on a to-do list, things are consistently easier said than done.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Raging Blatant Superheroes
More and more wisdom coming from more and more sources; even the Rolling Stones have a nugget or two to offer...
1. "Perception is more important than what actually is."
2. Question marks, more often than not, are unnecessary.
3. When one plans to go somewhere "out of the way" where they are surrounded by no-one they know, one will undoubtedly bump into everyone they know.
4. If you feel guilty about not having seen someone, chances are they are feeling guilty too. Make the first move.
5. The beach is not so awful after all...
6. ... and a tan can only be achieved in the absence of sunscreen.
7. "When you opt for musical therapy, what you are left with after it's all passed are beautiful songs laced with poignantly negative feelings."
8. Cryptic wall posts render the act of posting on someone's wall much more calculating.
9. Folding laundry while inebriated requires approximately 3.46 times as much time and 4.39 times as much energy as when attempted sober.
10. An empty wine bar leaves plenty of space for 'interesting' conversation.
11. Fireworks are expensive.
12. “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
13. The only person to spot your mistake will be the one person who will hold it against you :)
14. The one Friday night you choose not to go out is the same Friday night on which you will be unable to fall asleep anytime before 6:38am.
15. "You shouldn't have to be anything other than totally content without even the teeniest exception. You shouldn't care about any guy who isn't a raging, blatant superhero. That's what we need in life, anything else is simply not worth bothering with. "
16. One must always apologize if one feels that they have behaved badly.
See below (always clickable for source)
1. "Perception is more important than what actually is."
2. Question marks, more often than not, are unnecessary.
3. When one plans to go somewhere "out of the way" where they are surrounded by no-one they know, one will undoubtedly bump into everyone they know.
4. If you feel guilty about not having seen someone, chances are they are feeling guilty too. Make the first move.
5. The beach is not so awful after all...
6. ... and a tan can only be achieved in the absence of sunscreen.
7. "When you opt for musical therapy, what you are left with after it's all passed are beautiful songs laced with poignantly negative feelings."
8. Cryptic wall posts render the act of posting on someone's wall much more calculating.
9. Folding laundry while inebriated requires approximately 3.46 times as much time and 4.39 times as much energy as when attempted sober.
10. An empty wine bar leaves plenty of space for 'interesting' conversation.
11. Fireworks are expensive.
12. “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
13. The only person to spot your mistake will be the one person who will hold it against you :)
14. The one Friday night you choose not to go out is the same Friday night on which you will be unable to fall asleep anytime before 6:38am.
15. "You shouldn't have to be anything other than totally content without even the teeniest exception. You shouldn't care about any guy who isn't a raging, blatant superhero. That's what we need in life, anything else is simply not worth bothering with. "
16. One must always apologize if one feels that they have behaved badly.
See below (always clickable for source)
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Flaky rock 'n' roll
"But in the long run we have found, silent films are full of sound, inaudibly free..."
1. Missing someone can be somewhat healthy.
2. A leaked hotel guest list can cause one to become excessively sneaky, albeit in complete vain!
3. A "rich husband" may not be all that it's cracked up to be.
4. An email sans body can nevertheless make one smile in the morning.
5. The longer things run smoothly, the bigger the crash at the end of the tunnel.
6. Professional comfort is an urban legend. The omnipresence of office politics and air conditioning always interfere.
7. Honesty is best expressed in writing. Or in drunkeness.
8. "It seems to me that maybe, it pretty much always means no."
9. Acknowledging one's existence while denying their importance is tricky business indeed.
10. Law of transitive property: Mailing lists belonging to cool people tend to consist of likewise cool people.
11. One must attempt to live by rock 'n' roll rules. See below for details.
1. Missing someone can be somewhat healthy.
2. A leaked hotel guest list can cause one to become excessively sneaky, albeit in complete vain!
3. A "rich husband" may not be all that it's cracked up to be.
4. An email sans body can nevertheless make one smile in the morning.
5. The longer things run smoothly, the bigger the crash at the end of the tunnel.
6. Professional comfort is an urban legend. The omnipresence of office politics and air conditioning always interfere.
7. Honesty is best expressed in writing. Or in drunkeness.
8. "It seems to me that maybe, it pretty much always means no."
9. Acknowledging one's existence while denying their importance is tricky business indeed.
10. Law of transitive property: Mailing lists belonging to cool people tend to consist of likewise cool people.
11. One must attempt to live by rock 'n' roll rules. See below for details.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Inadequate replacements
A housewife with a great kitchen, children who are seen and only very occasionally heard and an unlimited access to Tiffany's is undoubtedly the ideal occupation.....
1. Consistent Sleep Deprivation (CSD) can't possibly be good for one's physiology, nervous system or mental health.
2. In times of CSD, Consistent Coffee Deprivation (CCD) can't possibly be good for one's physiology, nervous system or mental health.
3. Timing is key when cooking several things at once, especially if said meal includes mashed potatoes.
4. Cooking is often seen as a daunting task which, if achieved correctly, may mean exponential return business.
5. People may say a lot of things. Meaning what they say is a whole different ballgame.
6. Apple juice is a meagre replacement for coffee.
7. "Conversation is where life gets interesting."
8. Documenting learnings while under stress yields disjointed and seemingly incomplete results.
1. Consistent Sleep Deprivation (CSD) can't possibly be good for one's physiology, nervous system or mental health.
2. In times of CSD, Consistent Coffee Deprivation (CCD) can't possibly be good for one's physiology, nervous system or mental health.
3. Timing is key when cooking several things at once, especially if said meal includes mashed potatoes.
4. Cooking is often seen as a daunting task which, if achieved correctly, may mean exponential return business.
5. People may say a lot of things. Meaning what they say is a whole different ballgame.
6. Apple juice is a meagre replacement for coffee.
7. "Conversation is where life gets interesting."
8. Documenting learnings while under stress yields disjointed and seemingly incomplete results.
Karmic proportions
Bluey purpley moods have a way of pervading the atmosphere and sinking into one's skin...
1. For most, interest in a member of the opposite sex is inversely proportional to the attention received from said member.
2. Separating business and pleasure is a skill which, once mastered, makes life much easier.
3. Spelling mistakes on a government website make one seriously rethink their geographic choices.
4. Being nice and being intelligent are also mutually exclusive.
5. Cards, unlike puzzle, food and chilling, is something that you can win at. For some, it is only ever something you can lose at.
6. WARNING: Objects (of one's affection) are closer than they appear.
7. One must manoeuvre one's political environment very knowledgeably and very carefully.
8. When given the chance, most people are inherently good. The rest, once identified, must be avoided like the plague.
9. Karma, one learns, has an uncanny way of biting one in the ass. Or one hopes so at least.
10. Middle of the night messages which one does not regret the next morning are rare but possible.
11. Sometimes, the only option is damage control.
12. "Don't be a pimp. Or a hoe." (see below, and below the below)
(Find of the day: Someone else's somewhat disturbed but perhaps equally profound learnings which we can all stand to learn a thing or two from maybe...)
1. For most, interest in a member of the opposite sex is inversely proportional to the attention received from said member.
2. Separating business and pleasure is a skill which, once mastered, makes life much easier.
3. Spelling mistakes on a government website make one seriously rethink their geographic choices.
4. Being nice and being intelligent are also mutually exclusive.
5. Cards, unlike puzzle, food and chilling, is something that you can win at. For some, it is only ever something you can lose at.
6. WARNING: Objects (of one's affection) are closer than they appear.
7. One must manoeuvre one's political environment very knowledgeably and very carefully.
8. When given the chance, most people are inherently good. The rest, once identified, must be avoided like the plague.
9. Karma, one learns, has an uncanny way of biting one in the ass. Or one hopes so at least.
10. Middle of the night messages which one does not regret the next morning are rare but possible.
11. Sometimes, the only option is damage control.
12. "Don't be a pimp. Or a hoe." (see below, and below the below)
(Find of the day: Someone else's somewhat disturbed but perhaps equally profound learnings which we can all stand to learn a thing or two from maybe...)
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Appropriate eating venues
The mélange of alarm clocks, coffee, grumpiness and lovely weather is an ambiguous indication of how one's day will develop...
1. "Don't shit where you eat."
2. If you opt to eat outside, be prepared for the possibility that the mosquitoes did too.
3. Pampering oneself, although apparently extravagant, is somewhat of a necessity to re-feel like a human being.
4. The most unlikely contenders may often offer the best compliments.
5. Expect nothing. That way, everything that comes your way is a bonus.
6. One is inevitably grumpy in the morning unless greeted by a kiss, a wondrous cup of coffee and an unusually big stack of pancakes with real maple syrup. And by "one", I mean "me".
7. 'Sight-seeing' can be done from the confines of one's hotel room.
8. Given complicated circumstances, mutual attraction can yield horribly catastrophic and dangerously disastrous outcomes. Keep it in your head.
9. When one is intoxicated, one must not be allowed access to one's phone.
10. Coffee has 3 times the levels of antioxidants as green tea.
11. Chilling is usually accompanied by tea and complimenters. And puzzle sometimes.
12. There is a certain sense of calm that comes with finishing a satisfyingly great book.
13. If you think your job sucks, there is another one out there that is much much worse. (Illustrative example appears below for your reference.)
1. "Don't shit where you eat."
2. If you opt to eat outside, be prepared for the possibility that the mosquitoes did too.
3. Pampering oneself, although apparently extravagant, is somewhat of a necessity to re-feel like a human being.
4. The most unlikely contenders may often offer the best compliments.
5. Expect nothing. That way, everything that comes your way is a bonus.
6. One is inevitably grumpy in the morning unless greeted by a kiss, a wondrous cup of coffee and an unusually big stack of pancakes with real maple syrup. And by "one", I mean "me".
7. 'Sight-seeing' can be done from the confines of one's hotel room.
8. Given complicated circumstances, mutual attraction can yield horribly catastrophic and dangerously disastrous outcomes. Keep it in your head.
9. When one is intoxicated, one must not be allowed access to one's phone.
10. Coffee has 3 times the levels of antioxidants as green tea.
11. Chilling is usually accompanied by tea and complimenters. And puzzle sometimes.
12. There is a certain sense of calm that comes with finishing a satisfyingly great book.
13. If you think your job sucks, there is another one out there that is much much worse. (Illustrative example appears below for your reference.)
Delectably inebriated
Every now and then, and whatever form it takes, we all need a little 'tirami su'.......
1. When you are on the cusp of doing something which you are certain you will later regret, carefully consider the weight of enjoyment versus the weight of remorse, and then act accordingly.
2. "Pulling a Lara" (please refer to new definition) is more fun in the presence of its namesake.
3. A medium-sized Fendi bag accommodates a full bottle of vodka quite comfortably.
4. Being awoken by the unforewarned pounce of a love of your life makes the whole day a little more smiley.
5. In the absence of sunshine, you can always turn to a first-floor apartment, two bags of chips, three or so cigarettes and four gossipy friends instead.
6. If something tastes delectable when you are inebriated, you will feel reluctant to venture near it in times of uncharacteristic sobriety.
7. Certain 44th floor bars serve distinctly delicious olives. Which also happen to be within reach if sitting strategically at the bar.
8. When one uploads photo albums, one must be mentally prepared for the management, follow-up and feedback of the pictures. Oftentimes, comment moderation may require outsourcing.
9. When making your way to an early Sunday morning meeting, rest assured that your counterpart is just as sleepy and just as coffeeless as you.
10. Difficult conversations, although somewhat difficult to have, are even more difficult not to have.
11. If a gentleman remembers several details of an intoxicated exchange he shared with you, put him on the 'keepers' list.
12. The more alcohol coursing through one's veins, the more X-rated the topics of conversation one might be inclined to engage in.
13. When giving someone a gift, yes, it's the thought that counts. But it's usually also nice if the gift works.
14. Sometimes, not often, life is just like the movies.
1. When you are on the cusp of doing something which you are certain you will later regret, carefully consider the weight of enjoyment versus the weight of remorse, and then act accordingly.
2. "Pulling a Lara" (please refer to new definition) is more fun in the presence of its namesake.
3. A medium-sized Fendi bag accommodates a full bottle of vodka quite comfortably.
4. Being awoken by the unforewarned pounce of a love of your life makes the whole day a little more smiley.
5. In the absence of sunshine, you can always turn to a first-floor apartment, two bags of chips, three or so cigarettes and four gossipy friends instead.
6. If something tastes delectable when you are inebriated, you will feel reluctant to venture near it in times of uncharacteristic sobriety.
7. Certain 44th floor bars serve distinctly delicious olives. Which also happen to be within reach if sitting strategically at the bar.
8. When one uploads photo albums, one must be mentally prepared for the management, follow-up and feedback of the pictures. Oftentimes, comment moderation may require outsourcing.
9. When making your way to an early Sunday morning meeting, rest assured that your counterpart is just as sleepy and just as coffeeless as you.
10. Difficult conversations, although somewhat difficult to have, are even more difficult not to have.
11. If a gentleman remembers several details of an intoxicated exchange he shared with you, put him on the 'keepers' list.
12. The more alcohol coursing through one's veins, the more X-rated the topics of conversation one might be inclined to engage in.
13. When giving someone a gift, yes, it's the thought that counts. But it's usually also nice if the gift works.
14. Sometimes, not often, life is just like the movies.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Mutually charming
learning, noun
1 : the act or experience of one that learns
2 : knowledge or skill acquired by instruction or study
3 : modification of a behavioral tendency by experience (as exposure to conditioning)
And now that you know what it means...
1. Never underestimate the power and presence of friends-by-default.
2. Perfectly unreliable people can also be perfectly nice people. Reliability and pleasantness are two mutually exclusive qualities.
3. If someone is "cute" and "reeeeeally nice", this doesn't make him any less married.
4. You cannot win or lose at 'food'. Examples include: pizza, or the spiciness of chicken.
5. In an unusually small world, dating news travels swiftly.
6. The show at the Moulin Rouge is, in actual fact, not that sexy. Especially if your hero and heroine are attracted to the same sex.
7. It is a good idea to surround yourself by people who love you in spite of your occasional hormonal aggression.
8. It would be terribly lovely to have "Block Sender" and "Report Spam" buttons in real life.
9. Drinking a lot of water results in a lot of trips to the bathroom and "hence" a lot of breaks throughout one's day. Drinking a lot of water is good for you.
10. When one puts one's mind to something, one can completely and triumphantly achieve it. Especially, I'd like to think, when one is aided by 'good vibes'.
11. Timesheets have a way of reminding you that someone else owns a third of your day. (Another third is spent asleep. Use the last third wisely.)
12. Food and eating-related emails always elicit passionate responses.
13. Thursday has an exquisite sort of charm, especially when one repeatedly and mistakenly believes it to be a Sunday.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
My Blueberry Day
There is much to learn in the confines of one's own abode...
1. Looking through approximately 1,328 pictures of Italy and France makes one begin thinking that perhaps living in Italy and/or France is a thoroughly lovely idea. A far better idea than living in Dubai.
2. Watching 3 movies back to back on one's couch with a cup of tea is the best way to spend a Wednesday.
3. There is no such thing as regret when one had no choice.
4. Laundered, ironed bed sheets makes one consider crawling back into bed before the sun has even set.
5. One can survive a day on Early Grey tea and Water. And Kit Kat.
6. Even though you may had decided quite adamantly that your decision was the 'right' one, sometimes you have to let go of principle because there are things in life that are more important than others.
7. A faulty phone makes one feel unjustly lonely.
8. Sometimes, for no reason whatsoever, a girl just wants to be surrounded by beautiful flowers.
9. The prospect of a meal is exciting only in the presence of wonderful company.
10. "Sometimes, even if you have the keys, there are doors that still can't be opened."
1. Looking through approximately 1,328 pictures of Italy and France makes one begin thinking that perhaps living in Italy and/or France is a thoroughly lovely idea. A far better idea than living in Dubai.
2. Watching 3 movies back to back on one's couch with a cup of tea is the best way to spend a Wednesday.
3. There is no such thing as regret when one had no choice.
4. Laundered, ironed bed sheets makes one consider crawling back into bed before the sun has even set.
5. One can survive a day on Early Grey tea and Water. And Kit Kat.
6. Even though you may had decided quite adamantly that your decision was the 'right' one, sometimes you have to let go of principle because there are things in life that are more important than others.
7. A faulty phone makes one feel unjustly lonely.
8. Sometimes, for no reason whatsoever, a girl just wants to be surrounded by beautiful flowers.
9. The prospect of a meal is exciting only in the presence of wonderful company.
10. "Sometimes, even if you have the keys, there are doors that still can't be opened."
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Surprising states of mind
"She can crawl out a frame while she's hanging on the wall..."
1. Communiation with family members lends itself to oddly bizarre topics of conversation, including but not limited to appropriate naming conventions and leaves.
2. Being 'chill' is far more comfortable than being stressed. Both states of being are simply a state of mind.
3. It is possible to miss people who live in the same country as you.
4. When surprised by a visit from one of the loves of your life, you will find it very difficult to stop smiling.
5. When distant shit hits the fan somewhere near, you might find yourself in the unfortunate position of having to clean it up. You will have no choice.
6. "Don't invite assholes to meetings."
7. If you know that the movie you are going to see is bad, then getting there early is necessary. The trailers are probably the best thing you'll see all night. (If you know that said movie is High School Musical 3, fret over how and why you ended up there and consider efficient and effective methods of removal of oneself.)
8. Wake-up calls are a simple but thoughful way to improve someone else's quality of life.
9. When someone you thought was perhaps interesting and intelligent cites 'The Da Vinci Code' as "the best book ever", quickly and quietly remove yourself from the discussion to avoid additional time wastage.
10. The most common massacre of the English language is the confusion of "your" and "you're". Yes, this stresses me out.
11. Talking to a machine, also known as 'leaving someone voicemail' is more perplexing than it sounds and may cause one to:
a) lose track of time
b) lost track of words escaping one's mouth
c) entertain the person on the receiving end
12. 'Eleventh hour learnings' often trigger the posting of said learnings. And are often the most important of posted learnings.
1. Communiation with family members lends itself to oddly bizarre topics of conversation, including but not limited to appropriate naming conventions and leaves.
2. Being 'chill' is far more comfortable than being stressed. Both states of being are simply a state of mind.
3. It is possible to miss people who live in the same country as you.
4. When surprised by a visit from one of the loves of your life, you will find it very difficult to stop smiling.
5. When distant shit hits the fan somewhere near, you might find yourself in the unfortunate position of having to clean it up. You will have no choice.
6. "Don't invite assholes to meetings."
7. If you know that the movie you are going to see is bad, then getting there early is necessary. The trailers are probably the best thing you'll see all night. (If you know that said movie is High School Musical 3, fret over how and why you ended up there and consider efficient and effective methods of removal of oneself.)
8. Wake-up calls are a simple but thoughful way to improve someone else's quality of life.
9. When someone you thought was perhaps interesting and intelligent cites 'The Da Vinci Code' as "the best book ever", quickly and quietly remove yourself from the discussion to avoid additional time wastage.
10. The most common massacre of the English language is the confusion of "your" and "you're". Yes, this stresses me out.
11. Talking to a machine, also known as 'leaving someone voicemail' is more perplexing than it sounds and may cause one to:
a) lose track of time
b) lost track of words escaping one's mouth
c) entertain the person on the receiving end
12. 'Eleventh hour learnings' often trigger the posting of said learnings. And are often the most important of posted learnings.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Dating in the Matrix
Mornings have a way of appearing deceptively optimistic...
1. If you come across a seemingly interesting person before a word has been exchanged, more often than not they will cease to be interesting once that first word is shared.
2. "A hat always gets you more attention from a man because it means one more article of clothing for him to remove."
3. Certain culinary concoctions are considerably and completely comforting.
4. Sleeping in for a an extra hour or so can be very disconcerting.
5. The more one is aware of the number of people reading one's words, the more carefully one deliberates, contests and chooses those words.
6. Cleaning out a fridge is utterly therapeutic.
7. You can win at chilling, but certainly not if you're in Sho Chos. Buddha Bar lends itself much more willingly as a venue to the task.
8. If one quits one's job to become a writer, one unwittingly eliminates one's abundant source of writing material. Cake for thought, so to speak.
9. (See diagram below. Self explanatory. And oh, thank you "bright, socially adept consultant".)
1. If you come across a seemingly interesting person before a word has been exchanged, more often than not they will cease to be interesting once that first word is shared.
2. "A hat always gets you more attention from a man because it means one more article of clothing for him to remove."
3. Certain culinary concoctions are considerably and completely comforting.
4. Sleeping in for a an extra hour or so can be very disconcerting.
5. The more one is aware of the number of people reading one's words, the more carefully one deliberates, contests and chooses those words.
6. Cleaning out a fridge is utterly therapeutic.
7. You can win at chilling, but certainly not if you're in Sho Chos. Buddha Bar lends itself much more willingly as a venue to the task.
8. If one quits one's job to become a writer, one unwittingly eliminates one's abundant source of writing material. Cake for thought, so to speak.
9. (See diagram below. Self explanatory. And oh, thank you "bright, socially adept consultant".)
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